Epiphany: Reflections on Rhythms

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During the last week, we have had many conversations about the rhythms of our life.  This was not planned but a conversation that came up naturally through the things the Lord has been teaching us in this season of life.  It is especially fitting for this season of Epiphany in which we are intentionally working on growing in areas of spiritual discipline.

As a family, we want to set rhythms that help us in many ways.  Of course, we want to have rhythms that help us have an orderly home and a disciplined lifestyle – this benefits every member of our family.  But we also want to make sure that the rhythms of our life are helpful for our sanctification and the discipleship of our children.  We want rhythms that cause us to dwell on the goodness of God and the beauty of His story, and we want our children to grow up in a home where they learn to do the same.

Dreaming of Rhythms

We are in a season of life that requires more self-discipline than we have ever had to exercise before.  Micah is a PhD student, and we have come to learn that it requires much not only of him but of our whole family.  Micah must be diligent and disciplined in his studies, and to allow him time to do so, I must be diligent in the work of our home.

In the last year, we worked hard to set up daily rhythms so that we might nurture our children, take care of our home, and be diligent in our studies.  We want to be present parents, good stewards of our home, and hard workers.  I could talk to you for a while about the benefits of these rhythms and how helpful they have been in this season.

Many of these rhythms are rhythms of work, but we have come to learn that we must also incorporate rhythms of rest.  We have begun to dream of new rhythms for our family and how we might incorporate them into our lives.

Rhythms of Rest

Lately, we have been having a struggle with toddler nap times and bedtimes.  I’m sure so many of you have been there and know how exhausting it can be to have a little one who fights sleep and even seems scared to go to sleep at times.  I have been repeating these simple phrases with Simeon over and over, hoping they will take hold and form him:

Mama: Simeon, do you know that Mama loves you?

Simeon: Uh-huh

Mama: No matter what you do?

Simeon: Uh-huh

Mama: And that I’ll always be here if you need me?

Simeon: Uh-huh.  Dada!

Mama: Of course, Dada loves you no matter what you do and will always be here if you need him.  Simeon, do you know that God loves you, no matter what you do?

Simeon: Uh-huh (I wish you could hear that response in his little toddler voice each time).

Mama: Does God ever sleep?

Simeon: Noooo.

Mama: And because God never sleeps, he always watches over and takes care of you.  You don’t have to be afraid.  You are safe.

Simeon: Safe!

God never sleeps.  He never tires.  He holds the world in His hands and sustains it at every moment.  He is constant.  I need this reminder too.

Yet God – in His all-knowing, lovingkindness – knew that we do sleep.  We are tired.  We cannot sustain the world, or even keep order, in our own lives.  We are not constant.  And so, in His all-knowing, lovingkindness, God created rhythms of rest for His people.

In the Old Testament, we see how God gifts His people with the Sabbath, a time of weekly rest.  He gifts them with times that the land rests and with festivals and feasts where they rest and celebrate.  It’s not just a bunch of laws and rules to follow.  God gave His people the good gift of rest, knowing that they are merely human and need it.

Rest is worship because in doing so we admit that we are only human, incapable of sustaining anything, and recognize that God will continue to sustain the whole world in His good work.

We need rest, and rest is an intentional act of discipline.

Daily, Weekly, Monthly, Yearly

We are trying to think through our rhythms in each way – daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly. We’re still in the planning phase right now, but we’re dreaming of what these could look like and what it looks like to rest the way God intends for His people to.

Daily: Many of our daily rhythms are what keep our home running smoothly.  It includes things like dishes and laundry, intentional time with our children, and setting aside time for studies.  Along with this blog post, I am releasing a daily disciplines tracker that you can download for free when you subscribe to my newsletter!  You can use it to gather ideas and keep up with your everyday tasks – having somewhere to mark off what I’ve done is not only motivating but helps me stay on top of things.

For our daily rhythms of rest, we have reflected on our screen time and our bedtime.  I started using an app this week that is helping me set up social media and phone boundaries.  I am addicted to my phone, and it is not helping me to be the present mom I long to be.  I have also set a firm bedtime of 10:30.  Anything leftover for the day will be there tomorrow.

Weekly: We have begun to think through our weekly rhythms of rest as well.  Each week, we want to make sure both of us get a few hours of alone time.  We have also started weekly date nights, a habit that has already helped our relationship so much!

In the coming weeks, we will be working to start a weekly rhythm of Sabbath – a time of rest as a family where we put up our phones and get away from our work to enjoy resting and being with one another.  We can’t wait to start this time every week as a family remembering how God created us to work and rest.

Monthly and Yearly: For our monthly rhythms, we will be taking one date night out a month and making time away (even just a short time) a priority in our marriage.

Our family will plan to take at least one family vacation a year doing what we love most – exploring new places and the beautiful world God created together.  We also dream of being able to take one weekend each year that we can spend in solitude with the Lord, though that may not happen in the coming year.

Some Final Thoughts

We live in a culture that values hurry, hustle, and overwork.  It often even bleeds into the life of the Church.  But that is not what God intended for His people.  God created us to work and to work hard.  But He also created us with limits and intentionally gave His people the gift of rest.  May we seek to be people who worship God through obeying His command to rest.  May we fight against hurry and overwork and look with hope to the day that we will work and rest in the presence of God for all eternity.